Tali in Toronto

Today today today

Ugh..I just wrote a whole entry and lost it. I hate that. Stupid computers.

Nothing much to tell. Monday night I had yoga...which I have really been enjoying although I'm recognizing that I need to get more interesting or I'm going to blow up like a balloon. Last night i got to buy some Xmas gifts and then go home for my fave shows - Rebel Billionaire (love that Richard Branson) and the new Amazing Race. And then tonight I'm going to see "Saw". I hope it's good and not a total disappointment. Scary movies can go either way.

I'm less busy in Toronto these days. Maybe I'm less a novelty. I don't know. I'm so paranoid that I'm continuously thinking it is because I'm unpleasant to be around. Now that I am a local - and people are getting to know be better - they don't like me. Some day I feel fudamentally unlikeable.

Being insecure is hard work.
I wish I knew how to fix it.

Don't get me wrong. It isn't that I dislike myself..I just worry so much that people out there don't like me. It can be really upsetting. Frustrating.
*sigh*
I often wonder if I am good at my job. If I am a good friend. If I am a good person. Do I have any skills or talent?
I have no idea.

Is this like a mid-life crisis?

Ok, have to work. If I lose this again, I just may lost my mind.
(don't I sound mopey...yucksa!)

"I survived because I was tougher than anyone else." - actress Bette Davis, at age 66, commenting on her career

posted by TF @ 8:43 AM